I am pregnant

I just had to start a post with that title.  I mean, why not? It's true.  I am unbelievably weary of it and very very scared but I need to say it out loud.  So there you go, I am 4 weeks and 6 days pregnant. 

I feel a tiny bit more confident in saying that.  When I did that test on Friday I was worried that underneath the digital reader the lines would be minimal again and it was just that the digital reader could pick it up.  Because the stick has to come out of the reader so you can re-use it I wanted Mr Waiting to dismantle it as I did not want to see the lines just in case it was faint again.  However, 30 seconds later he came and shoved it under my nose! Here is what we saw:

There's not much arguing with those lines! Although seeing the word 'Pregnant' is so lovely, there's nothing more satisfying that seeing two strong blue lines, lines I've never seen before in all the many tests I've done throughout the last 18 months or so.  

Today I was thinking how we are just at the beginning.  A time when most people don't realise they're pregnant yet.  Definitely a time when not many people know you're pregnant.  Yet, in our case, most people in our families know because of my hospitalisation.  And we really are just at the start. But to get to the start we've had such a journey.  Today I made a list, and I don't even think it's exhaustive.

Just to get pregnant: 

• 21 contraceptive pills
• 29 buserelin injections
• 59 (and counting) metformin pills
• 3 packs of pre-natal vitamins
• 10 stimulation injections
• 3 follicle scans
• 1 internal uterine measurement via catheter through cervix
• 1 trigger injection 
• 11 blood tests
• 42 rectal pessaries (still counting)
• 84 estradiol valerate tablets
• 2 surgical procedures (one under heavy sedation)
• 1 abdominal ultrasound scan
• 2 IV cannulas
• 4 anti sickness injections
• 3 anti sickness tablets
• 4 fluid drips
• 15 Clexane (blood thinning injections) and counting. 
• 1 pair of compression stockings
• Several co-codamol/paracetamol
• Dozens of bruises
• Several severe vomiting episodes
• Severe constipation 
• Oh, and four semen samples for Mr Waiting 

So in total that's about 257 tablets (not including pain killers), about 58 injections, and 42 pessaries.  Not forgetting that I am still going with all three of these categories!

And all of that was just to get to where we are now, 4 weeks and 6 days pregnant.  We have so far to go yet we have been through so much.   I am still taking the Clexane injections, the metformin and the pessaries and vitamins so it's not straightforward yet.  

Please, just get me through that 7 week scan soon so I can relax a bit (though I bet I post after that very un-relaxed!).